I could never understand why things turned out this way, but what can you do? The most precious thing on this planet is time. Many days I wish things could be different, how much I wish it is only a click of a finger to turn back time. Had God made our lives cross over for a reason? I see no sense in this. Is this truly for the greater and the better future that supposedly lay before us all? Where did my father above gone? Had He feel no love for me? Had I been an awful daughter? Please help me father...
I had to cover up Diosa's cage, she's driving me crazy. She might be upsetting Amor more than me, but I don't even know anymore. Diosa continues to whine, now even louder than before.
Amor had already shed her wings, she's lost hope. Every night her heart-wrenching cry wakes me up. I could no longer comfort her without waking Diosa, so I just stay still where I am; in that awful dream tat tortures all of us.
It would always begin with him and I sitting on the swings together, laughing, joking about, having the best of time. I could see our little cottage home in the distance with the warming glow of lights pouring out from the windows. The next second, we would be chasing each other around in our little front yard next to the lake, which we called the ice Queen. He would grab hold of my arm and spin me around, catching my fall in his strong arms. We would laugh even more and uncontrollably until we run out of breath. Then he would land a gentle and warming kiss on my cheek that felt like forever engraved into my melting heart.
Amor would have her beautiful wings back, she would once again; enchant us with her charming voice that would even warm someone like Hitler's heart up.
Near our house, there is a hill protecting us from all the evil things outside. The hill is covered with blooming orchids in the color of blue, purple, pink and white.
Then one day, a little bicycle would appear out of nowhere in our little from yard. So he and I decided to get our picnic gear and head up the hill for the best view. The day would seem endless, we would ride up and down the hill, spinning in circles round and round on the bike laughing. And finally when the sun sets at the end of the day, we would park our bike near by and start our picnic. We had wine, pasta and cheese cake. Under the candle light, we would enjoy the most stunning view; with the sun setting over the ice Queen, our little cottage home down the bottom with the swings staring up at us jealously. He would hold me in his arms and forever whisper in my ear those favorite words I love to hear 'I love you...' until I fall asleep.
Then I would wake up to the cold stare of Eddy. The girls are silent under his cold stare. My voice would be stuck in between my aching, dried up throat. I check the time, 5:45am exactly, the same time as every other morning. I would sigh and tell Eddy to piss off, roll over and hope to squeeze more sleep out of me.
My beautiful nightmare would continue to torture me night after night... In the background I could hear Diosa's horrible whining and Amor's heartbreaking cry...
...endless.
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