Sat. 22nd Mat .10

Today I opened my eyes, I saw that life could be so different, could be so exciting. I see that image of love everywhere; I see couples holding hands, love songs played by the river side, romantic cafes, even love stories being played on the television. It is like God is either trying to make fun of what I've lost, or He is trying to show me how to love again. I took notice, but I could only laugh and cry at the same time. I do not know how to respond to Him, I wondered to myself; everybody what's that happiness, but who actually knows what it means? Or even what it is...?


These days I like to pick my nails for some reason, and today I accidentally took too much off my left thumb. Because my nails had always been long and quite strong, so my finger tips has never touched anything before.
It felt strange at first running my tips across the smooth skin of my thumb, it felt like a small child's hands. A gentle tap like a baby dreaming, it is sensitive, almost not real. Exciting, exhilarating but strange and new at the same time.

Skip a heart beat, takes your breath away, almost like electricity... I think this must be what if feels like to fall in love; blissful but a little painful at the same time.

Like sweetener to my heart...